Tuesday, May 5, 2015

Five Nights at Freddy's...Childhood Trauma Re-ignited!!

Row, row, row, your boat, gently down  the mainstream,
Here we are now with dear old Freddy,
Every hipster's worst dream!


So, for those of you non gaming nerds who somehow haven't heard of this Chuckie Cheese gone bad franchise, allow me to introduce you to your newest reason to not sleep at night: Five Nights at Freddy's!

From the demented mind of Scott Cawthorn, we have an actually pretty clever indie horror game. I mean it's not going to make all of us piss our pants (you lucky swine) but it does force us to relieve the unpleasantess of those creepy singing robots from Chuckie Cheese that have plagued us for over a generation. So how does this game work?

Baically you're sitting on your ass watching a screen while Freddy Fazebear and his merry bad of serial killers try to stuff you into a suit. They're a real friendly bunch. The reason this game is so scary though lies within the pscology of it all. All you can do is literally sit there, pray that the game allows you to close the doors, and try not to use up all your power. It's frightening because we know what's coming, and esectially, there is not much you can do to stop it. It raises our anxiety levels to the point that even when we know the jump-scare (one of the most over used and still the most effective forms of horror today) is ccoming, You panic looking for those devil bots, which makes you look for them on the screen...which uses more power, which  makes you panic more, making you rush back to your screeen....which usses even more power! Isn't this just a fun cycle?

But seriously , don't you remeber those times when you were a kid, and you could swear to Glob that something was staring at you in the dark? I would literally run to my parents bed. It's instinct, we are naturally trying to flee from our fears, adn whent the option of flight is taken from us, and there is absolutly no way of fighting, we are left in a helpless state.

So let's do the math: Chuckie Cheese the demented rat is coming to kill you + the fact that you can't do ANYTHING about it= nice nightmare fuel for creeps like Mr. Cawthorn (don't get me wrong, I love this game, but still). Let's also add the back story of Chuckie being possessed by the tortured souls of murdered children, and we have a party!

No what does this have to do with our animals in literature class? Well animals have always been nightmare fuel right? The hound of Baskervilles, werewolves, spiders, snakes, Grumpy Cat, are all fine examples how important animals have been in the process of taking our minds to the dark places that none of us have ever wanted to go. And a lot of times animals scare us unintentionally when put in the right setting, I mean, I can't be the only one whose creeped out by those giant Easter bunny outfits, those are creepy, grade A, pedophile nightmare inducers.

So let's have fun with animals and all the tears that they bring. I mean how scary can this:
Or this:
Or this:
Possibly be right? SO congratulations Mr. Cawthorn, for bringing my childhood nightmare of Chuckie back to life, now with murderous  intent!

Till next time ladies and gents!

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